Seducing Doctor Lewis
REVIEWED 05/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

This absolutely heartwarming and hilarious subtitled French-language comedy of errors is definitely a treat. Raymond Bouchard steals the show as Germain Lesage, the tiny jobless East Coast island village of St Marie du Moderne, Quebec's boisterous self-appointed leader on a mission to comply with the prerequisites of a potential factory there by wooing a permanent physician. Montreal plastic surgeon Christopher Lewis (David Boutin) ends up becoming the unwitting prime candidate, after he's pretty well blackmailed into arriving to avoid a drug possession charge, and Lesage systematically transforms that ramshackle welfare-stricken fishing port into a little piece of heaven - complete with cricket pitch, small bribes from goofy bank manager Henri Giroux (Benoît Brière), and whatever other weaknesses Germain can unscrupulously discover from enlisting his wife Helene (Rita Lafontaine) to tap the good young doctor's calls home to his metropolitan girlfriend and colleagues. Too funny.

Director Jean-François Pouliot brilliantly squeezes every drop of humour and delightfully rich personality out of Ken Scott's superbly tight and uproarious script here, giving you a completely satisfying romp filled with thoroughly captivating characters throughout. From the several comedic nuances, such as one fellow feigning a look of serious contemplation while not-so inconspicuously trying to free his finger stuck in a beer bottle, to the big laugh moments whenever these simple islanders attempt to impress Lewis or the skeptical plant boss, it's truly a mystery why 'La Grande Séduction' ('Seducing Doctor Lewis' is its international title) didn't garner more than one win out of its impressive ten Genie nominations earlier this year. This fresh 2003 Sundance audience winner is easily on par with any small movie you've probably left the theatre afterwards with sore ribs from laughing over, and is definitely well worth checking out. Good stuff.

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The Snow Walker
REVIEWED 05/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

Wow. Based on infamously renowned Belleville, Ontario-born wunderkind writer and activist Farley Mowat's 1975 short story, 'Walk Well, My Brother', this amazing 2003 sleeper is definitely a welcome surprise well-deserving of attention and praise. Barry Pepper is simply phenomenal as 1950's Golden North Air Charters' rather brazen ace pilot Charlie Halliday, stranded in the middle of the Northwest Territories during a detoured autumn flight from Yellowknife in his Norseman bush plane. What screenwriter/director Charles Martin Smith - who starred in the wonderfully successful Mowat-based 'Never Cry Wolf' (1983) - does here is give you a simple yet captivating survival story, as Halliday and his unscheduled passenger Kanaalaq (beautifully played by new comer Annabella Piugattuk) trudge through the black fly-infested desolate tundra and face the onslaught of a brutal Northern Winter towards eventual safety.

It's primarily an intriguing character study mixed with soft yet obvious culture clashes, that doesn't try to overtly exploit tired racial clichés or contrive Hollywood moments. James Cromwell, Kiersten Warren and Jon Gries capably round out the supporting cast, but it's an obvious stroke of genius casting Pepper in the lead role because his outstanding talent brilliantly rises to the challenge of predominantly carrying this hour and forty-three minute Genie-nominated screening with impressive results. Trust me, that's a major achievement. Sure, Smith's script does curiously tend to meander into Charlie's haunted memories of his wartime bomber pilot days without much explanation or really tying that in to the main tale, and the pacing does slip a few times due to sheer environmental sparseness and an apparent lack of internal crisis rising to the surface for Halliday and Kanaalaq when it could have, but I'd have to say that 'The Snow Walker' is over-all one of the best English-language features from Canadian Cinema that I've seen in quite a while. Definitely check out this absolutely worthwhile gem if you ever get the chance.

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The Saddest Music in the World
REVIEWED 05/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

Manitoba-based director Guy Maddin's legless beer baroness' song contest comedy set in Depression era Winnipeg is undoubtedly the worst pile of big screen junk that I've ended up sitting through this year. Mostly shot on a weird soundstage reminiscent of 'The Cabinet of Dr Caligari' (1919) in unnecessarily blurry-edged black and white, this hopelessly unfunny cinematic anesthetic pits greasy Americanized stage show producer Chester Kent (Mark McKinney) against his grief-addled famous cellist brother Roderick (Ross McMillan) for that hometown $25,000 prize and the heart of flaky nymphomaniac Narcissa (Maria de Medeiros). Isabella Rossellini plays Bergman-esque Lady Helen Port-Huntley, the millionaire double amputee footing the bill and reaping the profitable publicity from her factory's radio broadcasted competition at the height of nearby US Prohibition.

What makes this stinker such a total waste of time and celluloid is co-writers Kazuo Ishiguro's, Guy Maddin's and George Toles' aggravatingly stupefying script that clicks out reams of amateurish dementia and artsy fartsy affectation capped by truly abhorrent acting from this otherwise capable cast. I do realize that Maddin was attempting to spoof 1930's Cinema with a kind of quirky theatrical self-effacement, but the dismally over-long hour and forty-minute screening is so unintelligibly disjointed and overwhelmingly boring throughout, that any laughter from the paying audience that I endured this teeth grater with was pretty well the laughter of embarrassment and frustration. Sure, the idea of Rosellini wearing full-sized glass legs that are filled with beer is hilariously strange, but that last quarter two-minute chuckle maker is pretty well the funniest scene tossed your way, folks. Frankly, it's bewildering that this turkey was even considered a recent Genie Award nominee, let alone it becoming a three-category winner. This awful disaster should have gone straight to video, without a distributor or any attention wasted on it.

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Shrek 2
REVIEWED 05/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

Well, after much apparent anticipation, this fairly similar fairy tale charactered sequel to the hugely popular Oscar-winning $267 million grossing 'Shrek' (2001) - loosely inspired by prolific children's book novelist William Steig's (1907-2003) thirty-two page 1990 story intended for four to eight year-old readers - has finally arrived. What you get this time around is more of the same PDI/Dreamworks computer animated shenanigans somewhat watered down, featuring the now lovelorn eight foot tall green ogre Shrek (voiced by Mike Myers) seeing his recent bride (Cameron Diaz as Princess Fiona) tricked into believing that self-infatuated Prince Charming (Rupert Everett) is him, after a disastrous meeting with her royal parents in the kingdom of Far, Far Away sends Shrek and sidekick Donkey (Eddie Murphy) on a short quest that magically transforms them into a butch-looking human and a white stallion.

The theme of self-acceptance seen in the first flick is still front and centre here, as are the wealth of skit-like references to other memorable movies such as 'Mission Impossible' (1996) and 'The Mask of Zorro' (1998) played out by this storybook cast that includes Antonio Banderas voicing Puss in Boots. The problem is, there's not a whole lot that's new or fresh here. Mainly because the rather hollow spoofery throughout tends to overshadow any real attempts by directors Andrew Adamson, Kelly Asbury and Conrad Vernon to make you care what happens. With all of its borrowed charm and relatively soft wit, 'Shrek 2' feels cobbled together and quickly loses momentum long before the final inevitable sing-along, pretty well forcing you to hunt for more than just the anachronistic background gags in order to stay interested. Toddlers and kids at heart will undoubtedly love this decidedly fluffy ninety-three minute feel good offering, but the entertaining original feature was better paced and, well, far more original.

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Soul Plane
REVIEWED 05/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

Essentially a contemporary remake of 'Airplane!' (1980), director Jessy Terrero's debut feature film attempts to cram pretty well every self-effacing cliché and cultural fallacy about Black America into this slightly less than an hour and a half screening. The majority of its ensemble cast being made up of capable comedians such as Mo'Nique Imes-Jackson and veteran John Witherspoon do offer the threat of hope that co-writers Bo Zenga's and Chuck Wilson's rather clunky and crass, skit-driven script has a fighting chance beyond forgettable star Kevin Hart or headliners Snoop Dogg's and Tom Arnold's teeth-grating onscreen roles throughout. Terrero tries desperately, but this over-all turkey takes several nosedives soon after take-off. Dogg, who plays hip yet untested Captain Antoine Mack as the vertigo-stricken dope smoking pilot on NWA's maiden flight from Los Angeles to New York, pretty well sleepwalks through his scenes in a momentum-killing glassy-eyed haze of visible disinterest for the most part. Arnold does give more of an effort as passenger Elvis Hunkee, stuck in this tricked up purple plane's locker room-like Economy Class while bumbling through a doomed relationship with his two precocious kids and his wandering eyed girlfriend Barbara (Missi Pyle), but it's mainly a performance of pulled faces and fish out of water scenarios done much better elsewhere in the past.

There's hardly anything or anyone captivating enough or worth caring about, really. Sure, 'Soul Plane' does contain some freshly funny set ups and potentially good ideas that do sporadically hit their target from time to time, but the overwhelming onslaught of jokes dismally pander to cheap laughs and droll shock value over actually being entertaining or funny when followed through with. For instance, having Mack's pilot school class made up of dubious-looking Middle Eastern convicts, or Witherspoon as a blind skirt-chaser getting nasty with a baked potato, simply fall flat here. Frankly, I found this flick to be badly cobbled together and fairly boring during the last two-thirds, and wouldn't really recommend it as anything other than a mildly curious adult-oriented rental if the Zucker brothers' dated yet superior farce mentioned above, or even any of the four original and laughably cheesy 'Airport' 1970's disaster movies inspired by the late Arthur Hailey's 1968 best-selling novel, aren't readily available. Disappointing.

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Super Size Me
REVIEWED 06/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

New York City-based award-winning playwright and former corporate ad director Morgan Spurlock was apparently first inspired to make this rather slanted yet comedic cautionary documentary after learning of the specific 2002 lawsuit - reportedly the first of its kind brought to US court - filed by the parents of Bronx teenagers Jazlyn Bradley and Ashley Pelman against McDonald's Corporation, on the grounds that the girls' diagnosed obesity, heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure and elevated cholesterol were the result of them eating that multi-national company's fast food. So, much to the chagrin of his Vegan chef wife Alex, this medically healthy six foot two inch tall, hundred and eighty-five and a half pound native West Virginian decided to see what would happen if he went on a thirty-day 'McDiet'. Eating three meals every day exclusively from the menu without exception, agreeing to super size his orders whenever asked, reducing his level of daily exercise to that of the average North American adult, and enlisting cameraman Scott Ambrozy to record the entire process - subsequently released in American theatres through co-distributors Samuel Goldwyn Films and Destination Films (a subsidiary of Sony Films, sister company to Sony Music - whose subsidiary online song download company Connect has ironically signed a recent worldwide cross-marketing deal with McDonald's called 'Big Mac Meal Tracks').

What you end up sitting through is Spurlock's relatively swift descent into a cesspool of illnesses and organ damage as he elicits various factoids and preachy opinions from the likes of outspoken health activist and George Washington University Law School's Professor of Public Interest Law John Banzhaf, health activist and Baskin-Robbins heir John Baskin, and nutritionist Bridget Bennett. Doctors Daryl Isaacs, M.D., Lisa Ganjhu, D.O., and Stephen Siegel, M.D. are called in to periodically monitor him over the course of this month-long binge turned road trip, and are suspiciously amazed at the data gathered during their examinations and blood tests while self-inflicted guinea pig Morgan ignores the obvious warning signs and visits McDonald's restaurants throughout Manhattan, Los Angeles, and the statistically 'fattest' city in the United States: Houston, Texas, as well as sidetracks into school meal programs and lax physical education. I'm not sure what he was attempting to provoke here, other than resounding agreement that dumb people do stupid things and usually avoid responsibility for ignoring common sense. However, 'Super Size Me' is a tremendously entertaining sideshow during the focused moments when a paying audience isn't expected to be shocked by fairly obvious discoveries. It's definitely strangely amusing, but patronizing and simplistic at times.

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The Stepford Wives
REVIEWED 06/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

With the silver anniversary reissue of the original 1975 big screen Sci-Fi thriller based on award-winning author Ira Levin's hundred and forty-five page 1972 novel already available on DVD for a couple of years, it wasn't too surprising when word of director Frank Oz's contemporary remake starring Nicole Kidman and Christopher Walken got out. The good news about this over-all irreverently retooled fantasy is that Paul Rudnick's screenplay basically manages to playfully expand upon its predecessors, giving a paying audience a softer take than that of the heavily taut frights in seeing the wives of Stepford, Connecticut being replaced one by one by 1950's Beauty Queen/June Cleaver-like robots a few months after putting down roots there. Kidman's Joanna Eberhart is a strong-willed workaholic producer, recuperating from a nervous breakdown after losing her high-priced Manhattan network television job on the eve of her wedding anniversary, quickly skeptical about that otherwise bright rural town's rather dim-witted female population led by matriarchal realtor Claire Wellington (Glenn Close). Her somewhat over shadowed and emasculated husband Walter Kresby (Matthew Broderick) takes it all in, easily inculcated by the local Men's Society headed by Claire's manly 'better half' Mike (Walken), to the point where Kresby begins to expect Joanna to fall in line and know her place.

Yes, this picture does enjoy poking fun at rather misogynistic-based outdated views. It's also great to see singer Faith Hill turn out a brief but reasonably impressive first picture performance, in her supporting role as ever-smiling uber-Anglo Sarah Sunderson. The bad news is, the wheels fall off the logic cart pretty fast. Over-all, this movie clicks out as a goofy lopsided farce, where Oz seems to have given his main cast carte blanc freedom to play their roles way over the top and pander to the camera with often embarrassing results. Where co-stars Jon Lovitz and Bette Midler steal the show with their usual brand of silly humour, Close and others try to squeeze out laughs in every scene as though they're passing a Buick-sized gall stone. Sure, it's fantastic to see Broderick back in a full-length feature, and there is a fairly satisfying surprise twist ending. However, even those enjoyments are rapidly eroded by a lot of puffy-cheeked theatrics from this ensemble of otherwise capable actors. I'd read somewhere that Kidman was told to take this role as a kind of 'summer camp' after her string of serious films and a recent cancer scare, and that Tim Burton was initially offered the helm here but turned it down. Well, this ninety minute version of 'The Stepford Wives' certainly feels a lot like a campy rip off of a Burton favourite for the most part. Good ideas and an underlying tight plotline are apparent, but they're smothered by so many layers of pure schmaltz and sabotaged by surprisingly clumsy editing throughout that it's difficult to really care what happens to anyone other than Mike White's cameo part shortly after the opening credits. One pivotal scene in particular, where the script pays slight homage to William Goldman's spooky twenty-nine year-old screenplay, is completely sidestepped later on when you're shown exactly what has happened to Sunderson and her neighbourly housekeeping kittens, sending you out of the theatre afterwards feeling as though you've just wasted an hour and a half to get five half decent laughs and a really bad taste in your mouth.

This one's a potentially fun and overtly fluffy rental if the smarter and superior original isn't available, but I wouldn't recommend you go out of your way to check it out.

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Spider-Man 2
REVIEWED 07/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

The good news is, the only real problem with this already acclaimed, often pulse-pounding and heavily CGI enhanced hour and a half action sequel to 'Spider-Man' (2002) had to do with reasons for the fairly plot-important faltering of this irradiated venom-induced web slinger's power never truly being explained. Is he ill? Just tired? Gassy? Did I miss something? Sure, Kirsten Dunst still feels miscast as New York's Empire State University freshman Peter Parker's (Tobey Maguire) free spirited childhood neighbour turned model and stage actress love interest Mary Jane Watson and seems little more than an unappealing human prop, while Maguire clearly works at honing the wonderfully torturous paradoxes of his dual role here. And, yes. This amazing, cleverly humour-spiked cinematic roller coaster ride does feature a few clunky bits, where certain facial contortions and some unbelievable stunts by ordinary people do end up being weirdly comical at the wrong time. Minor quibbles, though. Frankly, there are two obvious reasons why this $200 million crowd pleaser is far superior than its wildly successful big screen predecessor, based on Marvel Comics' former powerhouse president Stan Lee's and famed artist Steve Ditko's teenaged crime fighter that initially saw print in the 1962 fifteenth edition of 'Amazing Fantasy': While still a timid unlucky klutz beneath the webbed costume that frustrates his life, Parker's character development has drastically matured for the better, and his latest arch enemy is far less dramatically cartoony than Willem Dafoe's rather silly costumed Jekyll and Hyde inspired Green Goblin. Alfred Molina - who reportedly named his OsCorp-funded mechanical arm-assisted Doctor Otto Octavius' four clawed limbs Larry, Harry, Flo and Moe off screen - obviously had a blast playing one of Spidey's most famous rogue gallery villains and pulls in an outstanding, surprisingly complex performance here as a Shiva-like terror bent on returning the unstable power of his failed fusion experiment's mini Sun to the palms of his six hands.

Of course, returning director Sam Raimi continues to take creative liberties; this time regarding Spider-Man's self-defeating odd disinterest in keeping his identity a secret throughout (that, in one case, is somewhat reminiscent of a 'Batman Returns' (1992) moment starring Michael Keaton and Michelle Pfeiffer, and in another, where a familiar wardrobe changing shot from 'Superman' (1978) appears unabashedly lifted), but 'Spider-Man 2' does seem to remain generally true to the currently accepted comic book story and is an absolutely original entertaining romp. As a former longtime fan, I was specifically impressed with how Alfred Gough's, Miles Millar's, Michael Chabon's and Alvin Sargent's screenplay fleshed out most of these characters beyond the spirit of the books for an adult paying audience looking for something more than a load of finger puppets in flashy leotards mindlessly pummeling at each other 'til things get blowed up real good. Incorporating the groundwork for more ghoulish bad guy favourites by introducing some new background faces early on and embellishing upon this flick's primary and supporting cast is a welcome touch, so that (hopefully) the franchise doesn't turn into a simplistic drudgery of episodic star antagonists lazily conjured up from the evil chemistry set for each subsequent showdown. Good stuff.

Definitely check out this spectacular and thoroughly involving cinematic series installment for the fantastic, sometimes intense, effects and a truly enjoyable story over-all.

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Sleepover
REVIEWED 06/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

Alexa Vega (who played brainy big sister Carmen Cortez in the 'Spy Kids' trilogy) does a reasonably decent job starring as Julie Corky, a good-hearted yet precocious teenager roped into a rule-breaking scavenger hunt by former pal and popular blonde Stacy (Sara Paxton), during her Junior High School graduating night slumber party. The same amount of praise goes to Mika Boorem as Julie's cool best friend Hanna, as well as to Scout Taylor-Compton and Kallie Flynn Childress as her other two party invites making up the so-called good guy team in this light comedic caper flick obviously intended for adolescent girls. Playing out much like a slightly better-budgeted after school special television episode of 'Degrassi Junior High' or 'Ready or Not', this fairly soft romp is film maker of the eight-minute award-winner 'George Lucas in Love' (1999) Joe Nussbaum's feature directorial debut, penned by 'National Lampoon's Vegas Vacation' (1997) screenwriter Elisa Bell, and it actually does feel a lot like a CBC production - despite it being shot in California for MGM. And no, this isn't in any way connected to the 1989 cult horror 'Sleepover Massacre', but it does overtly attempt to pander to fans of the slightly similar premise of 'Catch That Kid' (2004) or even 'Mean Girls' (2004) as a feel good empowering movie for smart young women. However, it isn't smart.

One of my problems with 'Sleepover' had to do with the number of ridiculously insulting caricatures, such as the annoying burn out skater dudes and pretty well every adult male walk-on, stuffed in to nudge this predominantly innocent romp's momentum forward, with sometimes awkwardly age-inappropriate results. Scenes featuring Vega and Boorem - and co-star Sean Faris as the nice and hunky love interest Steve - do tend to run out of steam often. Meaning you're forced to sit through far more of Julie's College drop-out big brother Ren's (Sam Huntington) annoyingly bad performance than you get to enjoy more of the few truly funny sight gags sprinkled throughout. A lot of those laughs are already used in the ads to sell tickets and fill theatre seats, unfortunately. The bright side is that most of the main cast do make their characters interesting enough for an audience to care about what happens, despite these girls' puzzlingly exaggerated enthusiasm over slipping out at night against Mrs. Corky's strict rules, just to fulfill a four-item short list of pedantic shenanigans in order to win the choice lunch spot of status at high school for the following year. That's probably what completely sabotages this offering as a serious contender. The clearly vacuous motivation behind the entire plotline didn't strike me as being something these intelligent kids would really care about, leaving me feeling somewhat robbed of a potentially good time by a vaguely half-decent script that could have been a whole lot better.

I'm not going to recommend this one as a fully worthwhile piece of big screen entertainment, but the over-all efforts of Vega and her main circle do make it a possible good second or third choice rental on a rainy afternoon for bored pre-teens.

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Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring
REVIEWED 07/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

Writer/director Kim Gi-Deok stars in the final seasons of this visually lush yet dialogue-sparse subtitled 2003 feature that plucks pivotal moments from the somewhat difficult life of a monk-in-training, from his early childhood and through adolescence towards his self-disciplined manhood. Each section of this gorgeous-looking award-winning film begins with the large wooden doors of an ancient gate theatrically opening to invite you into its otherwise peaceful scenic mountain lake and the small square raft housing this character (also played by Jong-ho Kim, Jae-kyeong Seo, and Young-min Kim) under the stoic patient care of an old Buddhist monk (Yeong-su Oh). Sometimes superior performances from the entire adult cast truly bypass any fears of having to sit too long through its many sessions of aggravating Mime, with Yeo-jin Ha's part as a young sick girl brought to the aged Oh by her worried mother for holistic treatments - and as an initially unwitting temptation from the outside world for the boy - rounding out this otherwise fairly esoteric story.

And, that's the problem. This story does become overtly esoteric by the last reel. Leaving the actors to flounder in silence throughout. Where it's almost as if a paying audience needs to read up on Basic Buddhism 101 to fully appreciate every nuance and metaphor that sneaks in front of the lens here. What's the meaning behind some teeth fragments wrapped in red ribbon and stuffed into the forehead of a Buddha ice sculpture? Why is that woman's face completely hidden under a faded purple veil? There were a couple of times where I thought I'd missed the kiosk rack containing the Cole's notes booklet required to fully follow along with this movie. Sure, there are some scenes - primarily when the boy returns as a young man and is instructed to painstakingly carve out each pictogram of a mantra as a sort of cryptic healing exercise - that do carry meaning as well as holding your interest. However, this is really more the type of film where there's that underlying feeling that director Kim is manipulating you into believing it's raising your intelligence to a higher plain of enlightenment by feeding you a lot of beautifully crafted scenes set to a soothing meditative soundtrack and wrapped in a kind of borrowed 'Asia-centric' pastiche of religious icons, without really giving you much of anything. That becomes clear near the end, when we're suddenly given strange, self-infatuated freeze frame clips of Kim smacking out fairly flashy karate moves. I don't know why. Maybe because they look great - just like this entire picture looks great. Much like a calendar.

Check out 'Bom yeoreum gaeul gyeoul geurigo bom' (its original title) if you're interested in seeing something fresh from Korean Cinema, or if you just like movies that look like they were torn from the pages of National Geographic, but I wouldn't recommend sitting through its over-long hundred and three-minute screen time if you want an easily understandable story that doesn't feel like it needs an outside interpreter.

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Suspect Zero
REVIEWED 09/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

Recently transferred from Dallas to Albuquerque, brooding loner FBI investigator Thomas Mackelway (Aaron Eckhart, 'Erin Brockovich' (2000), 'Paycheck' (2003)) quickly becomes obsessed with a string of gruesome murders that evidently seem to have one thing in common: The victims are all unknown serial killers. What's more intriguing is that those brutally mutilated corpses appear to have been left specifically for him. This evasive vigilante, who turns out to be insanely haunted former military and CIA-funded remote viewer Benjamin O'Ryan (Brit TV's 'Coronation Street' alumnus and longtime Oscar-winner Ben Kingsley, 'Gandhi' (1982), 'Sexy Beast' (2000)), has his somewhat malevolent clairvoyant eye locked on Mackelway. Goading him on. Wanting him to follow this bloody trail of sliced up murderers abandoned under the pale glow of that New Mexican full moon, as Thomas and his uneasy partner and former lover Fran Kulok (Vancouver-born Carrie-Anne Moss, 'The Matrix' (1999), 'Memento' (2000)) try to piece together the mounting wealth of clues that all lead back to a map of the United States that O'Ryan has blanketed in tiny swatches of paper marked with some sort of indecipherable numeric code, left behind in a dark Oklahoma halfway house basement. Interviewing a former professor and colleague of this elusive figure tells more than Mackelway is willing to handle, and he's thrown into a breakneck race against time to find and stop O'Ryan before this macabre cross-country killing spree goes any further.

Well, this fairly intense picture apparently floated around Hollywood since 1997, until screenwriter Zak Penn's (who co-wrote 'Last Action Hero' (1993) and 'X-Men 2' (2003)) original script was finally picked up and reworked into director E. Elias Merhige's ('Shadow of the Vampire' (2000)) hugely compelling psychological thriller seen here. It's probably the first movie to feature remote viewing - a once highly classified technique used during the Cold War by the Russian military and then by the CIA and the American Army to eavesdrop on each other from thousands of miles away. Heard of police turning to psychics to find missing persons? Well, the US government funded the same thing in Fort Meade, Maryland from the mid-Seventies until 1995 under such project monikers as Grill Frame and Star Gate for more clandestine purposes, until Central Intelligence officially scrapped it. This profoundly intriguing cinematic offering deftly examines the possibly unthinkable (and hopefully fictitious) results of this one man burdened with the ability to see anyone and anything he focuses on, wherever he is. Sitting through its ninety-nine minute screening, I was initially skeptical that 'Suspect Zero' was going to end up resembling a 'Se7en' (1995)-inspired cousin to the Scott Baio teen turkey 'Zapped!' (1982), but almost immediately couldn't help but be reminded of Willem Dafoe's incredibly stunning performance as a Jesus locked at odds with being the true Son of God in Scorsese's controversial 'The Last Temptation of Christ' (1988). Of course, this crime horror and that landmark film are completely different. Dafoe's Christ didn't go around hacking the eyelids off of infidels while taunting the Romans - or, in Baio's case, lifting their skirts with a hairy-eyed leer. However, the similarities of an emotionally sensitive man having an unwanted power that relentlessly forces him to react one way or another are clearly obvious in Kingsley's thoroughly captivating, scene stealing character here. Awesome. Sure, a lot of this story is fairly contrived towards grossing out a paying audience as Eckhart and Moss walk around like wooden robots. And, that's a shame.

Check out this surprisingly inspired murder mystery as a definite worthwhile rental for its impressive originality as personified by Kingsley's incredibly compelling efforts.

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Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
REVIEWED 09/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
www.ofrb.gov.on.ca | www.rcq.gouv.qc.ca


REVIEW:

News Flash - New York City, 1938 - Downtown Manhattan is thrown into full alert and set under siege by a malicious enemy bringing death and destruction from above. Marauding armies of giant mechanical men have stormed down from the skies, laying waste to these peaceful streets with their destructive light rays and striking terror into the hearts of every man, woman and child sent fleeing for their very lives in a mass evacuation. Within minutes of a distress signal being sent out, heroic ace fighter pilot H. Joseph Sullivan, better known to our readers as Sky Captain of the valiant Elite Legion, narrowly saved the day in his incredible Spitfire and stopped these murderous iron monsters from pillaging our fair city's electrical generators. Reports of similar doomsday attacks are flooding in from around the world, as humanity is gripped by the fear of more surprise onslaughts. More updates and exclusive photographs of this harrowing attack and its devilish origins will be forthcoming, as the Chronicle's intrepid Metro Desk reporter Polly Perkins throws caution to the wind in joining Sky Captain on a death-defying expedition to the farthest reaches of the frozen snow capped Himalayan Mountains, possibly into the fabled forbidden realm of Shangri-La itself, to bring swift justice to the diabolical puppet master behind this insidiously fierce force of futuristic foes.

Well, if your memories include a wide-eyed childhood enjoyment of the wonderfully cheesy Republic Pictures (1935-1959) big screen serials, this completely CGI-generated, live-action hundred and seven minute homage to those bygone cliffhangers will definitely take you back to those treasured times. For the first twenty minutes, at least. Unlike what famed writer/director George Lucas acknowledges he did in heavily borrowing from, infusing with ancient mythology and science fiction to revive that genre with 'Star Wars' (1977), this visually impressive actioner feels more like a nostalgic, slightly anachronistic cousin of Disney's 'Tron' (1982) in the way that its cast members, headlined by Jude Law ('Gattaca' (1997), 'Road to Perdition' (2002)), Oscar-winner Gwenyth Paltrow ('Shakespeare in Love' (1998), 'Sylvia' (2003)) and Angelina Jolie ('Girl, Interrupted' (1999), 'Taking Lives' (2004)) - as well as some bizarrely manipulated archival footage of veteran superstar Sir Laurence Olivier (1907-1989), are obviously plunked in front of a blue screen and subsequently grafted into imaginary animated scenery concocted through post-production wizardry. The technical - albeit somewhat gimmicky and cosmetic - aspects of 'Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow' are fascinating, but really only because first time writer/director Kerry Conran does initially manage to capture the spirit of those rip-roaring cinematic shorts, as well as the Art Deco/Film Noir, comic books and sci-fi magazines of (more or less) that era. Probably because most of the familiar costumes, robots and shots do seem lifted directly from those sources. Unfortunately, the characters are fairly one dimensional finger puppets for the most part, failing to sustain lasting interest for contemporary moviegoers looking for more, and the over-all story seems to completely run out of steam about halfway through, failing to match Lucas' - and 'Indiana Jones' (1981, 1984, 1989) trilogy director Steven Spielberg's far more obvious efforts in adding something new, beyond the grin-evoking references and special effects. Instead, it basically leaves you to either marvel or yawn at the computerized scenery as this cinematic experiment clicks out 'til the closing credits. Yes, this is definitely a fun feast for the eyes. However, while sitting through this screening, I couldn't help but wonder why attempts weren't apparently made to dig up the originals from the vaults and simply clean up and edit them together to be re-released in theatres instead.

Definitely rent this one as an enjoyable curiosity harkening back to the original B-movie serials, but as someone who isn't particularly a purist, I still prefer the Oldies and the more original knock-offs from Spielberg over this technically superior yet bland romp.

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Shaun of the Dead
REVIEWED 09/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Disrespected Foree Electrics senior sales advisor and hopelessly disheveled twenty-nine year-old loser Shaun (Simon Pegg, '24 Hour Party People' (2002)) is having a bad day. His girlfriend Liz (Kate Ashfield, 'Beyond Borders' (2003)) has just ended their three-year relationship out of sheer frustration, and his housemate Pete (Peter Serafinowicz) has demanded that Ed (Nick Frost, 'Underground' (1998)), Shaun's lazy, boyhood chum should finally peel his gaseous butt off their living room couch and move out. And, the entire country is gripped in a sudden, horrifying plague that seems to be bringing the dead back to life as cannibalistic zom- uh, cannibals. Can't use the 'Z' word. It's silly and upsets him to call that growing throng of bloodthirsty walking cadavers, now roving his suburban London borough in escalating numbers for living victims to munch on and infect, the 'Z' word. So, in an uncharacteristic surge of heroics, Shaun's brilliant slice of fried gold plan is to save Liz and her snobby flat mates, his Mum (Penelope Wilton) and maybe his step dad Philip (Bill Nighy), by swiftly gathering them up with the help of Ed and armed with his trusty cricket bat, going round to The Winchester Tavern for a pint and a laugh, and waiting until this whole mess blows over, in this uproariously irreverent horror farce from longtime Brit TV comedy writer/director Edgar Wright.

Obviously, 'Shaun of the Dead' pays playful homage to legendary American director George A. Romero's famed litany of zombie movies beginning with his original 'Night of the Living Dead' (1968), but it also conspicuously references the landmark UK scare fest '28 Days Later' (2003) and the groundbreaking adventure comedy 'The Evil Dead' (1983) as Pegg and Frost hilariously stumble around like a couple of half-drunken buffoons completely unprepared for the catastrophic terror that surrounds them. This is pure British slapstick comedy at its best and goriest, packed with sidesplitting antics and ridiculous humour that are sure to have even the staunchest of cult horror fans howling out loud with laughter throughout. Sure, this hundred and eight-minute, expletive-riddled farce isn't particularly scary, and pretty well all of the gruesome bits are heavily tinged with wonderfully fresh sarcasm, but that's really what makes this UK blockbuster such an enormously enjoyable ride. Unlike any of its cinematic predecessors, when these guys actually come face to face with their first flesh-hungry attacker in their back garden, they think she's drunk and laugh wildly at her, with Shaun tilting her chalky face sideways for Ed's camera after she's jumped at his neck and knocked him to the ground. Hilarious. It's in how Wright imaginatively unleashes this quirky cast of characters upon these fairly familiar monsters turned into somewhat of a cliché by a recent glut of films reviving the genre that makes this such a superior offering throughout. The 'Dawn of the Dead' (2004) remake came close, still opting to stylishly gross out moviegoers over-all, where 'Shaun of the Dead' is much similar to the campy Elvis vs. Mummy 'Bubba Ho-Tep' (2004) in simply wanting you to laugh your guts out and keep coming back for more.

Sure, it's not the type of movie suited to everyone's tastes, but the packed audience of ticket-holders from diverse age groups that I was part of had a great time. If you're in any way a fan of horror and humour, do yourself a huge favour and check out this absolutely hilarious romp.

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Shark Tale
REVIEWED 10/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

When idealistic dreamer and Southside Reef Whale Wash tongue-scrubber Oscar the fish's (Will Smith; 'Enemy of the State' (1998), 'Ali' (2001)) miscalculated choices towards instant riches end up leaving him five thousand clams in debt, tied to a rock at the bottom of the ocean, and face to face with the infamous sons of Don Lino of the Great White Sharks (Robert De Niro; 'Meet the Parents' (2000), 'City by the Sea' (2002)), fate takes a twist towards the absurd as Oscar quickly (and erroneously) becomes known as The Sharkslayer, in this delightfully irreverent contemporary retelling of Walt Disney's Academy Award-winning Mickey Mouse nine-minuter 'Brave Little Tailor' (1938), and deliriously funny homage to pretty well every mafia flick ever made. Thirty years after De Niro played a young Vito Corleone in a defining, Oscar-winning flashback featured in 'The Godfather: Part II' (1974), he finally gets to completely lampoon himself (and the great Marlon Brando (1924-2004), who played the older Don Corleone) here in this role that pushes his somewhat typecast-effacing work in 'Analyze This' (1999) to new depths as the penultimate heavy of the sea against Smith's unlikely hero and Lino's less than bloodthirsty offspring Lenny (Jack Black; 'High Fidelity' (2000), 'The School of Rock' (2003)).

Pretty well everything about this astoundingly animated flick is hugely enjoyable, from love interest co-star Renée Zellweger ('Bridget Jones's Diary' (2001), 'Chicago' (2002)) and famed director Martin Scorsese hamming it up for their roles, to the endless stream of one-liners and extremely entertaining comedy featured throughout Rob Letterman's and Damian Shannon's screenplay. Much like 'Finding Nemo' (2003) managed to captivate its audience from a child's perspective through anthropomorphizing aquatic life, 'Shark Tale' finds absolute success in tapping a decidedly different, more mature morality play and presenting it with similarly-based characters. The main difference is that this hour and forty-minute saga is meant to be a riotous adventure, rife with obvious fun nods to such movies as 'Good Fellas' (1990), 'Jaws' (1974), and The Godfather trilogy. However, it's really the talents that voice these wonderfully fresh characters that keep a paying audience interested. It's clear this was a joy to make, since the undiluted playfulness contagiously bubbles to the surface from beginning to closing credits without really missing a beat. Particularly when Smith's and Black's panache for sheer goofiness are completely unleashed, resulting in some of the most sidesplitting moments seen on the big screen in a while. Sure, some of the scenes spotlighting a surprisingly star-studded supporting cast's asides do become somewhat distracting to the primary plotlines at times, but they're fairly minor in number and will likely end up becoming fun moments on their own merit for those instant fans who will undoubtedly sit through this absolute gem more than once, once it's released for rental.

Do yourself a huge favour and check out this immensely satisfying frivolous caper in the movie theatre for its astounding technical achievement and relentlessly wild hilarity.

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Silver City
REVIEWED 10/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Disgraced former Mountain Monitor reporter turned disheveled, recently dumped investigator Danny O'Brien (Danny Huston; 'Timecode' (2000), '21 grams' (2003)) is hired by cutthroat political handler Chuck Raven (Richard Dreyfuss; 'What About Bob?' (1991), 'Mr. Holland's Opus' (1995)) to do a simple task: Contact and warn three people that they're being watched. See, the corpse of an unregistered illegal migrant worker has unceremoniously appeared on the end of would-be Colorado governor Richard 'Dickie' Pilager's (Chris Cooper; 'The Patriot' (2000), 'Seabiscuit' (2003)) fishing line during preparations for one of his televised campaign messages, and Raven - already deeply in the pocket of Dickie's senator father and the Pilager dynasty's primary political backer, millionaire corporate baron Wes Benteen (Kris Kristofferson) - wants to ensure no further embarrassments, uh, float to the surface before the upcoming election. However, O'Brien can't help but let his curiosity carry him towards trying to solve that murder, turning his living room wall into a detective's blackboard of names, as he discovers more about Benteen's plans for complete deregulation once his rather dithersome candidate wins the governorship at any cost.

What two-time Oscar-nominated screenwriter and acclaimed long time independent film maker director John Sayles ('Lone Star' (1996), 'Sunshine State' (2002)) cleverly does here is slyly satirize the often times labyrinthine trail connecting suspiciously corrupt politicos and their throng of underlings with less than altruistic corporate interests and how those who know the truth are easily silence or destroyed. To that end, 'Silver City' - the name of a proposed housing development planned for land poisoned by decades of gold mining tailings flanking a toxic lake - is an interesting insight into the mindset of those effected by the machinations of unfettered greed, and does provide some reasonably meaty roles for co-stars Sal Lopez, Daryl Hannah, Miguel Ferrer and Maria Bello. Unfortunately, the story tends to flatten out fairly quickly and a paying audience is never really given the chance to care about O'Brien as anything other than a transporter into those far more captivating yet almost deliberately enigmatic larger than life characters he stumbles upon along the way. Whether that's the result of Sayles' script or a testament to the screen presence some of these players bring is up for debate. What happens is that you end up hopelessly wanting to spend more time chuckling at Cooper's waffling, hearing more rants from Ferrer, and just hanging out with Hannah 'til she blows another gasket than bother with Danny's overtly underplayed sideline sleuthing. It's almost as though this hundred and twenty-nine minute picture was purposely written to aggravate by keeping you on the sidelines without anything new to chew on, as much as it wanted to bring the prevailing, somewhat tired skepticism of jaded voters to the forefront. That's where 'Silver City' fails to meet its potential as a truly captivating screening. This isn't another 'All the President's Men', and certainly doesn't spotlight Pilager enough to be anything like 'The Candidate'. Both of those were and still remain great movies, where this one clicks out more like a pastiche of vague intrigue and disappointingly familiar conspiracy as backdrops for these wonderfully capable actors to wallow around in for a while. Curiously making this one far less entertaining than it easily could have been, and feeling as though the few laughs thrown in are really only there to keep you from falling asleep.

I'm avoiding calling this one an uninspired stinker, but it comes pretty close because a lot of the story punctuated by some really good performances seems so lazily cobbled together.

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Shall We Dance?
REVIEWED 10/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Initially inspired to surreptitiously step out of his repetitively normal life by the vision of a lovely young woman lost in thought at a lonely window his commuter train passes every night, twenty-year veteran Chicago legal advisor John Clark (Richard Gere; 'Runaway Bride' (1999), 'Chicago' (2002)) soon discovers his previously untapped bliss on the dance floor at Miss Mitzi's Dance Studio - where he finally meets that gazing, somewhat emotionally distant lady named Paulina (Jennifer Lopez; 'Maid in Manhattan (2002), 'Jersey Girl' (2004)) - in this surprisingly intriguing yet somewhat over-long remake from Brit-born director Peter Chelsom ('Serendipity' (2001)) of Masayuki Suo's award-winning Japanese film 'Shall We Dansu?' (1996). However, John's wife Beverly (Susan Sarandon; 'Thelma & Louise' (1991), 'The Banger Sisters' (2002)) soon suspects his so-called late nights at the office and sudden change in demeanor are signs that a secret infidelity might be threatening their nineteen year marriage, so she hires a private detective to either put her mind at ease or discover the awful truth. As it turns out, Clark is betraying her in a way, because - just as co-worker Link Peterson (Stanley Tucci; 'Road to Perdition' (2002), 'The Terminal' (2004)) is afraid to announce to the world that he's the meringue king after dark - John's ashamed to admit to her just how much he enjoys his new-found, two-stepping release.

Admittedly, this hundred and six minute offering is a sporadically dramatic contrivance for Chelsom to spotlight Ballroom and Latin dancing on the big screen. In other words, if you love those films punctuated by the uplifting tuneful work of Richard Rodgers (1902-1979) and Oscar Hammerstein II (1895-1960) - who also wrote the music for 'The King and I' (1956), including the score this feel good offering gets its title from - or pretty well anything featuring Fred Astaire (1899-1987) during his heyday, you'll probably love this movie. This one is definitely for contemporary dance enthusiasts first and foremost, taking its place somewhere between 'Funny Face' (1957) and 'Moulin Rouge!' (2001), without completely forgetting to provide enough romantic and comedic and dramatic story to keep the rest of us entertained. However, even though 'Shall We Dance?' does cleverly touch on a similar theme seen in 'The Full Monty', of males pursuing interests in something that could be taken as less than socially acceptable or manly, screenwriter Audrey Wells' half-quirky half-serious script wouldn't stand a chance without the marvelous talent and natural screen presence this incredibly capable main cast brings to the table. Gere is astounding, easily demonstrating his versatile showmanship throughout, opposite Tucci's over the top comedic interludes and Lopez' absolutely dazzling performance, under this capable director and John 'Cha Cha' O'Connell's jaw-dropping choreography that's wonderfully aided by film editor Charles Ireland.

Definitely check it out as a great, mature date flick.

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Surviving Christmas
REVIEWED 10/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

On the heels of an ugly break-up with his high society girlfriend Missy van Gilder (Jennifer Morrison; 'Urban Legends: Final Cut' (2000), 'The Edge' (2003)) during the height of the holiday season and desperately uneasy about spending Christmas alone in his sparsely decorated downtown loft apartment, Chicago-based Bar Code Media's top marketing pitch man Drew Latham (Ben Affleck; 'Changing Lanes' (2002), 'Daredevil' (2003)) returns to his childhood home in order to finally rid himself of residual grievances that have gotten in the way of him having a completely happy, normal life. Of course, the Valcos - the current owners of that cozy suburban two-story brick home - think he's a lunatic kneeling on their front lawn, about to burn his handwritten list of familial ill feelings, until they're suspicions are proved correct when Drew first begs then offers family patriarch Tom ('The Sopranos' television star James Gandolfini; '8MM' (1999), 'The Man Who Wasn't There' (2001)) two hundred and fifty thousand dollars to contractually recapture all of the merriment, joy, and various Yuletide glee of Latham's youth until 11:59pm Christmas Day. Much to the weary chagrin of Tom's wife Christine (Genie Award-winner Catherine O'Hara; 'Home Alone 2' (1992), 'A Mighty Wind' (2003)) and their emotionally numb fifteen year-old son Brian (Josh Zuckerman; 'Return to the Secret Garden' (2000), 'Austin Powers in Goldmember' (2002)), and to the outraged ire of Alicia (Christina Applegate; 'The Sweetest Thing' (2002), 'Anchorman' (2004)), who immediately takes a disliking to Drew as soon as she arrives home to spend time with her now beleaguered, rented family.

At first glance, this offering from director Mike Mitchell ('Frannie's Christmas' (1993), 'Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo' (1999)) clicks out as a fairly trite vehicle spotlighting Affleck's apparent need to revive hammy, unfunny comedic roles - despite turning in a successfully captivating performance in 'Jersey Girl' (2004). That is, until you realize halfway through that he's perfectly cast here as an easily unlikable and socially inept, eccentric millionaire with a pasted-on smile painfully trying to make (or pay) everyone to like him. Unfortunately, there's nothing much beyond the annoying stereotype for him to work with. That's also the main problem with this boisterously unentertaining hour and forty minute snooze fest: None of the main characters are particularly likable for the most part. Latham is self-centred and shallow. The Valcos consist of a relentlessly grumpy ogre, his surly spouse, and their vapidly perverted teen and piously brittle daughter. And, the one voice that could have easily injected the lion's share of pure comedic value to this outrageously dull flick; Doo-Dah (Bill Macy), a local actor hired by Drew to play his doting Grandfather, ends up being fed unpolished one-liners and then shoved aside with the furniture to make room for a lumber yard full of flat and wooden jokes. The story by Deborah Kaplan's and Harry Elfont's (who also teamed up to write 'A Very Brady Sequel' (1996) and 'Josie and the Pussycats' (2001)), lazily cobbled together by (count 'em) four screenwriters, completely falls apart as it stands. Simply because a paying audience is forced to sit through the entire movie until you're finally given any reasons to care about Latham's somewhat contrived predicament, or his clumsily blossoming romance with Alicia. It's too late. Frankly, Affleck and Applegate really only scratch the surface of appeal whenever they're not attempting to stay in character or act out for the camera, making 'Surviving Christmas' an excruciating and oftentimes aggravating experience throughout.

Save yourself the lingering indigestion and steer clear of this horribly undercooked, poisonously boring turkey, folks.

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Saw
REVIEWED 10/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Confused, shackled at the ankle, and brutally held captive under surveillance in a starkly-lit, ramshackle factory lavatory, LA hospital Oncologist Lawrence Gordon (Cary Elwes; 'The Princess Bride' (1987), 'Shadow of the Vampire' (2000)) discovers he's one of the latest victims in a mortally vicious spree of sick torture orchestrated by a shadowy psychopath known to police as The Jigsaw Killer. Actually, as Gordon points out to freelance street photographer Adam (actor/screenwriter Leigh Whannell; 'The Matrix Reloaded' (2003)) - his unwitting counterpart, similarly chained to the opposite wall of that rotting tiled tomb in this macabre game of terror and death - this notorious fiend has never taken anyone's life. Preferring instead to find gory ways for his relentlessly taunted prey to kill themselves or each other as penance and salvation for this or that imagined sin of apathy or self-destruction. All caught on videotape. All obsessively pored over by LAPD Homicide Detectives David Tapp (Danny Glover; 'Lethal Weapon 4' (1998), 'The Royal Tenenbaums' (2001)) and Steven Sing (Ken Leung; 'Rush Hour' (1998), 'Red Dragon' (2002)) as they race against time to catch this elusive madman. And, time is quickly running out for Adam and Lawrence, now that the rules have been set and the high price of freedom demands that someone must die within the next six hours.

Frankly, I can't remember the last time I sat through such an incredibly boring, non-scary horror movie. Sure, co-writer/first time director James Wan and Whannell do conjure up a number of disgustingly perverse ways for this cast to be mutilated or murdered throughout, but how this gooey mess is in any way supposed to be frightening as presented here is completely beyond me. The main problem is that you're never really given any reason to particularly care what happens to these fictional characters, since it seems this rather plodding, hundred-minuter relies too heavily on the screen presence of these actors as they wallow around under a lot of spooky lighting. Instead of this silly script giving them something worthwhile to work with, besides a couple of hacksaws and a lot of fake sweat. Much like the forgettably cheesy gore fest 'My Bloody Valentine' (1981), it's definitely gross to sit through at times, but never particularly chilling. Yawn. Sure, Elwes, Glover and Monica Potter (as Gordon's kidnapped wife Alison) obviously do give it their best efforts here, but even they're attempts at captivating a paying audience are irreparably marginalized by Kevin Greutert's exasperating need to cobble this film together as a broken, mismatched jigsaw puzzle in the editing room. The timeline is terribly muddled through the fairly inept handling of flashbacks, as well. It's a shame, because the potential for 'Saw' to be a thoroughly captivating crime thriller along the same lines as 'Se7en' (1995) or even the more contrived slasher picture 'Halloween' (1978) does vaguely shine through while convulsively spitting out scene after blood smeared scene of surprisingly flat suspense towards its hugely disappointing twist ending.

Save yourself the disappointment and steer clear of this disjointed, boring and lame stinker.

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Sideways
REVIEWED 11/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Sunken-hearted aspiring novelist and San Diego-based Eighth Grade English teacher Miles Raymond (Paul Edward Valentine Giamatti; 'The Negotiator' (1998), 'American Splendor' (2003)) is bent and determined to give his longtime friend from University, former Soap Opera star and Los Angeles television commercial voice over actor Jack (TV's 'Wings' (1990-1995) star Thomas Haden Church; 'Tombstone' (1993), '3000 Miles to Graceland' (2001)), the best week-long send-off possible. Jack is getting married on Saturday, to adoring girlfriend Christine Erganian (Alysia Reiner) and into a promising career in her rich father's thriving business. So, Miles and Jack hop in the car and head out on the open road through the sprawling sun-drenched vineyards of California, systematically stopping off to discover the nuances and the pleasures of fine wine as - apparently - only a true connoisseur like the slightly pompous Miles can appreciate. See, Jack sees this planned getaway as his last-ditch chance to sow his wild oats before tying the knot, and quickly realizes that his buddy's severely glum shyness and relentless moping over his own failed marriage might jeopardize all of that. Even when these two manage to hook up with Maya (Virginia Madsen; 'Dune' (1984), 'Candyman' (1992)), a gorgeous waitress at one of Miles' favourite watering holes, and a nearby winery's delightfully playful wine server Stephanie (Ottawa-born Genie-winner Sandra Oh; 'Double Happiness' (1994), 'Under the Tuscan Sun' (2003)), in this incredibly captivating sleeper hit from Academy Award-nominated writer/director Alexander Payne ('Election' (1999), 'About Schmidt' (2002)).

This extremely satisfying adaptation of writer Rex Pickett's 2004 novel is truly a gem, both in Payne's and co-screenwriter Jim Taylor's wonderful attention to the details of insightful dialogue and of wine in general, as well as in how this extraordinary cast so seamlessly presents these individually-flawed yet immediately interesting characters throughout. Giamatti instantly steals the show here, tormented by anxieties over his unpublished book and his unfulfilled life, slipping into a kind of emotional warm bath of tranquil pause whenever he's given the opportunity to talk about his passion for a specific wine or a particular grape. How it's grown and nurtured and refined by time. Magical. Same goes for Madsen, as Maya hesitantly flirts with Miles while thoughtfully sharing her similar interests, in an outstanding performance of obvious intelligence and maturity. Just seeing these two aching, lonely people together makes this hundred and thirty-six minute screening well worth spending time with. Throw in horny man child Jack's often-hilarious low brow foibles, and add the small legion of delightfully quirky supporting characters that these lifelong friends meet along the way, and 'Sideways' only gets better as it clicks along at a sharp and steady pace throughout. Man, I'm glad that I put off sitting through another big budget blockbuster to find this amazing cinematic treasure. Even the cool jazz soundtrack is excellent.

Sure, it's a low key dramatic comedy that's primarily character-driven, without a lot of huge laughs or eye candy, but if you're feeling parched for a truly satisfying story meant for a paying audience of adults, this wryly-written, nudity-tinged R-rated film is an absolute must-see. Awesome.

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Seed of Chucky
REVIEWED 11/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Haunted by gory nightmares of murderous carnage and facing a hopelessly miserable existence under the cruel fist of its tyrannical British master, a peace-loving and self-animated puppet (voiced by Billy Boyd; 'The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring' (2001), 'Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World' (2003)) is inspired to escape and find his long-lost parents recently seen during an Access Hollywood television on-set piece covering the new American horror movie, 'Chucky Goes Psycho', based on that notoriously brutal, legendary doll. However, this soft-hearted and freckle-faced, Ziggy Stardust-like toy - named Glenn or Glenda by its folks - quickly realizes that Chucky (Brad Dourif, 'Alien: Resurrection' (1997), 'The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King' (2003)) and wife Tiffany (Jennifer Tilly; 'Liar Liar' (1997), 'Monsters, Inc.' (2001)) truly are insane killers and; despite its new found Mum's attempts to change for the better and her plans to switch souls with real life actress Jennifer Tilly and director Redman (as themselves) by using the magical amulet that gives life to this demonically crazed pint-sized couple, is slowly pushed towards a bloodthirsty madness by its terrifying, blade-swingin' Dad.

This incredibly cheesy yet delightfully irreverent fourth sequel from 'Child's Play' (1988) - reportedly first offered to disinterested Universal Studios honchos back in 1998 - marks longtime writer and Chucky creator Don Mancini's directorial debut, picking up where the hilariously morbid body count left off in 'Bride of Chucky' (1998). Tilly is absolutely brilliant here, relentlessly poking fun at her rather loose on-screen persona throughout while that gruesomely stitched, orange-haired doll chortles and slashes through Tinsel Town and a cast of cameos that also includes director John Waters as sleazy Celebrities Revealed photojournalist Pete Peters. Sure, this deservedly R-rated flick is an intensely tasteless and boorish gore fest rife with sex and nudity and hideously mutilated victims. However, the over-all efforts of this crew, the film's impressive production value and great cinematography from Vernon Layton throughout make its ninety-six minutes well worth checking out for fans of this cult genre. The animatronics from Film Illusions are absolutely outstanding here. And, although the script is hugely contrived and overtly self-infatuated with corny asides, 'Child's Play 5' (its working title) does deliver as being an enormously entertaining, twisted adult romp from beginning to familiar end.

Definitely rent this one for Tilly's delightfully fresh performance, and as a truly worthwhile continuation of Chucky's memorably macabre legacy.

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Stage Beauty
REVIEWED 11/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Adapted from playwright Jeffrey Hatcher's fact-based 'Compleat Female Stage Beauty' set in post-Cromwell 1660 during the beginnings of England's Reformation by returned exile King Charles II (1630-1685) (Rupert Everett; 'My Best Friend's Wedding' (1997), 'The Importance of Being Earnest' (2002)), famed female impersonator Edward 'Ned' Kynaston (1640-1706) (Billy Crudup; 'Sleepers' (1996), 'Big Fish' (2003)) is forced to face a rather daunting reality. The Toast of London's revived Drury Lane after all theatres were summarily closed by Parliament eighteen years earlier, Ned has thoroughly enjoyed the exhalted celebrity he's earned with Thomas Killigrew's King's Company Theatre playing women; often encouraged to appear dressed in full drag at huge posh functions amongst the aristocratic elite and in rather private trysts with their daughters and sons. However, word of his mousy young dresser Maria's (Claire Danes; 'The Mod Squad' (1999), 'Terminator 3' (2003)) illegal underground performance as William Shakespeare's (1564-1616) Desdemona in 'Othello: The Moor of Venice' - as Mrs. Margaret Hughes, the first woman you're told eventually, legally, portrays a woman on the exclusively male dominated English stage - mere blocks away from where Kynaston delicately plays that same doomed role to a nightly theatre audience of his roaring fans, soon reaches the attention of the royal court by his own pernicious doing. Unintentionally leading the King to initially encourage women to become professional actors by decree, and to subsequently banish men from playing female roles all together (ironically) for Puritanical reasons similar to those that led to Charles II's exile. Ruining Kynaston's career overnight, and allowing malicious scandal to personally destroy him, until he's begged to return home as Hughes' acting coach for Killigrew's much-anticipated new presentation of 'Othello' to be attended by the King, and starring the new Toast of London: Margaret Hughes.

This potentially captivating period film from Brit director Sir Richard Eyre does boil a lot of history into a somewhat simplistically written feature of otherwise wonderful talent. Frankly, the best aspect of 'Stage Beauty' is in how these contemporary actors depict bygone theatrical acting, with its broad stylized gestures and vocal work, and then step into their off-stage 'real' characters, still portraying obviously anachronistic yet believable enough actors from that era. Truly impressive. It's partly a play within a play, with Shakespeare's 1603 famous tragedy of perceived betrayal casting an obvious overtone to what transpires for Crudup's and Danes' easily fascinating roles here. Even though Kynaston wasn't actually the last of his kind, as this movie's tagline suggests. Just look to Pantomime, or - outside of the UK - Kabuki theatre, for instance. And, that's where this hundred and ten minute screening becomes bogged down in a kind of revering self-importance throughout. Teetering on a narrow grey line between farcical pastiche and compelling drama, while a paying audience seems encouraged to accept this fairly extremist story that tends to collapse under its own weight. Sure, the main premise and theme of transexuality is initially well-handled here for the most part, showing Edward gleefully mocking gender barriers as a relatively convincing female both in and out of character, while Margaret/Maria mimics his well-practiced 'Five Positions of Feminine Subjugation' as his ambitiously secret protégéé. However, the romance that develops between them feels overwhelmingly contrived and fairly simplistic when you're eventually shown Hughes 'converting' Kynaston into becoming the man he never was previously, in a scene that simply appears curiously intended for wincing homophobics rather than for Hatcher's screenplay to seriously examine this character's rejuvenating transformation towards an incredibly climactic final act. And, that's a shame.

Definitely check it out as a worthwhile peripheral to the far superior 'Shakespeare in Love' (1998), and for the great acting and sporadically sharp-witted dialogue found throughout, but be prepared for the story to suddenly fizzle out halfway through, before your attention is violently jarred back into focus by Crudup's last fifteen minutes of thunderous - and conspicuously modern - performance here.

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SpongeBob SquarePants
REVIEWED 11/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Awakened from his triumphant sleep by his foghorn alarm clock, buck-toothed and bright googley blue-eyed, neon yellow and cardboard trousers-wearing SpongeBob SquarePants (voiced by Tom Kenny; 'Shakes the Clown' (1992), 'Eight Crazy Nights' (2002)) gleefully hurries to work, where he confidently expects his boss Eugene Krabs (Clancy Brown; 'Flubber' (1997), 'Carnivàle' (2003)) to promote him from lowly Krusty Krab fast food restaurant fry cook to high managerial status at the brand new Krusty Krab 2 that's opening soon, immediately next door. Well, that doesn't happen. He doesn't get to celebrate getting that job, despite SpongeBob's earlier plans with his happy pink starfish friend and neighbour Patrick Star (Bill Fagerbakke; 'Gargoyles' (1994-1997)) to sing and play and party 'til they're purple at Goofy Goober's famed Ice Cream Parlour and Nutbar after the big, rather humiliating announcement. However, the devious machinations of Plankton (Mr. Lawrence; 'Rocko's Modern Life' (1993-1996)), Krabs' nearby rival restaurateur and owner of the floundering Chum Bucket, soon take centre stage with Evil Plan Z, framing and threatening Eugene's life after iron-fisted King Neptune's (Jeffrey Tambor; 'Mr. Mom' (1983), 'Hellboy' (2004)) gleaming gold and pearl crown is stolen, and it's up to SpongeBob and Patrick to leave their homes in Bikini Bottom Reef on a treacherous, monster-infested journey in Krabs' suped up, steel belted pickle and fuel injected deep fryer engined Patty Wagon towards the feared and distant Shell City to retrieve the King's crown in six short days. Everyone's skeptical that they can do it. SquarePants and Star are just a couple of kids, after-all. They're bubble blowing double babies. A couple of Knucklehead McSpazmatrons, as somebody points out. However, Princess Mindy (Scarlett Johansson; 'The Horse Whisperer' (1998), 'The Perfect Score' (2004)) believes this silly-headed duo might succeed with the right motivation - and a little help. And so, they set off into the unknown, with Plankton's mean chopper-riding hired thug Dennis (Alec Baldwin; 'Glengarry Glen Ross' (1992), 'The Cat in the Hat' (2003)) hot on their trail, in this deliriously contagious animated comedy starring creator/writer/director Stephen Hillenburg's bizarre undersea characters from his popular three-time Emmy nominated Nickelodeon television series.

While the majority of this ninety minute big screen cartoon is definitely bloated with a lot of corny humour intended for an audience of children and young teenagers, it's extremely difficult to say that 'SpongeBob SquarePants' is only for kids. The laughs are relentless throughout, simply because much of the dialogue is so incredibly silly yet so wonderfully paced that a paying crowd of all ages can't help but find enough here to, well, hook into and burst out laughing at. It's like discovering a lost reel of feverish Abbott and Costello and The Three Stooges-like irreverence, filtered through the wildly creative wizardry of Walter Lantz (1899-1994) ('Woody Woodpecker' (1941)), Fred 'Tex' Avery (1908-1980) ('Daredevil Droopy' (1951)), Chuck Jones (1912-2002) and Friz Freleng (1905-1995) ('The Bugs Bunny Show' (1960-1962)) and John Kricfalusi ('The Ren & Stimpy Show' (1991-1993)). It's really that good, folks. Virtually the entire movie is like one big frenetic sugar rush for the senses, taking short breaks to let you breathe, before quickly overloading you with more of SpongeBob's all-consuming enthusiasm while dunking you head first into this delightfully imaginative world. Frankly, I was extremely surprised at how hilariously captivating this completely fun, consistently over the top flick is from beginning to closing credits. No wonder it took Hillenburg almost two years to complete, with five other writers and two other directors on board. Astounding. It's also funny to see that David Hasselhoff's ('Knight Rider' (1982-1986), 'Baywatch' (1989-2001)) natural panache for self-deprecating humour gets a serious work out here, goofing around as himself in his orange tan and orangier swim trunks during the final act.

Definitely do yourself and your funnybone a huge favour and check out this incredibly worthwhile offering on the biggest movie screen that you can find, and don't be surprised if you leave the theatre afterwards catching yourself thinking that the first verse to the famed traditional 17th Century sea shanty 'Blow the Man Down' is: "Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?" Too funny.

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Spanglish
REVIEWED 12/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Flor Moreno (Paz 'Vega' Campos Trigo; 'Sex and Lucia' (2001), 'Talk to Her' (2002)) has taken on more than she bargained for. In the hopes of giving her young daughter Cristina (Shelbie Bruce) a proper life of hopeful opportunity in America, this bright-eyed Spanish-only speaking Mexican eventually realizes that she must step out of the safe, two-job existence of Los Angeles' Latin Quarter to become a better paid domestic for the typically dysfunctional Clasky household. John Clasky (Adam Sandler; 'Happy Gilmore' (1996), '50 First Dates' (2004)), a former New Yorker and burgeoning restaurateur chef, seems completely out of his depths while trying keep his kids, Bernice and Georgie, sane. His wife Deborah (Téa Leoni; 'Bad Boys' (1995), 'The Family Man' (2000)), an ex-marketing executive turned neurotic housebound vortex of destructive nurturing, quickly becomes enamoured with Cristina as the perfect daughter that her own teenaged girl 'Bernie' (Sarah Steele) isn't becoming fast enough. Deb's alcoholic eccentric mother Evelyn (Cloris Leachman; 'High Anxiety' (1977), 'Bad Santa' (2003)) is the closest thing to a voice of reason, frankly. However, Flor tries to make the best of it. Standing her ground against the Clasky's continual invasion of her privacy and motherhood, and slowly working to break the language barrier by learning English. Until she sees just what an ultimately detrimental influence this environment is for Cristina, and Deb finally admits a terrible secret to John that threatens to completely tear this family apart.

I'm really not sure how much of writer/director James L. Brooks' ('Broadcast News' (1987), 'As Good as It Gets' (1997)) screenplay was actually referred to come post-production, but this low key and wildly disjointed dramatic comedy clicks out like a star vehicle for individual character studies colliding in horrible slow motion for the most part. Yes, Sandler does a great job as the token male drowning in all of that molten estrogen. However, this is really Leoni's and Vega's mess. With both of them clawing for screen time as their diametrically opposing roles butt heads without much of a plot to hold a paying audience's interest from beginning to closing credits. Don't get me wrong, all of these actors truly do pull in some wonderful performances throughout. The comedic timing and superior dialogue are potentially well worth the price of admission. And, if excessively ridiculous orgasms are still in vogue, Leoni might get an Oscar nomination out of it. The main problem is that 'Spanglish' feels edited together as a different movie than what its individual pieces intended it to be. For instance, the sweet romantic epiphany of this hundred and forty-four minuter's final reel comes out of nowhere and just as quickly evaporates. John's exasperation over Deb's continual familial disregard is clear, but you're never shown where that relationship of enabling and self-absorption originated from. And, it's climactic resolve or disintegration is never shown. They don't care, so why should you? This picture feels more like a wrestling match of Hollywood politics and violently converging stereotypes, where all of the briefly cited interesting stuff is quickly pushed aside so that a lot of pedantic crying and yelling and storming out of slamming doors can emerge in lieu of actual entertainment for mature ticket holders. Flor's initially captivating story ends up being pile driven by Deb's story - which is grabbed in a death grip headlock by, well, Deb's story - as John and the kids roll around in the fetal position for a while. Which is too bad, really. This could have easily been a far better, more complete offering as a thoroughly enjoyable whole; if Brooks had simply kept a tighter reign on his stars and film editor Richard Marks.

As a rental, this flick does contain some great scenes well worth stopping the fast forward to check out, but it's definitely not something that you'll likely want to torture yourself by sitting through in the theatre for three or four times the price.

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Swades
REVIEWED 12/04, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

Haunted by the death anniversary of his parents and unmoved by his American citizenship approval, India-born, Washington, DC-based NASA scientist Mohan Bhargava (Shahrukh Khan; 'Devdas' (2002), 'Chalte Chalte' (2003)) suddenly insists on taking a two-week leave of absence just as the second critical phase of his team's Global Precipitation Measurement satellite is set to begin. Mohan feels unsettled, brooding over his guilt of losing contact with Kaveriamma (Kishori Balal), his beloved nanny and surrogate mother since boyhood. So, with the hesitant approval of his boss, Bhargava arrives in his homeland's bustling capital city, only to discover that she's already left her New Delhi retirement home. Someone has taken Kaveriamma two hundred miles away, to the remote village Charanpur. Spurring him to politely beg for directions from a young woman he meets at a friend's book shop, and to quickly hire a camper in order to make the long trek in a comfort that he's grown accustomed to in the US. However, the directions are wrong. That unrecognized young woman turns out to be Gita (Gayatri Joshi), a school teacher in Charanpur who is afraid her childhood friend Mohan has returned to India strictly to take the old woman - Gita's only adult link to her own deceased parents - back to the United States with him. She's right. So, when Bhargava finally finds the village, he discovers far more than he'd bargained for.

Quite frankly, 'Swades' is an astounding showcase of Bollywood powerhouse Khan's immense acting talent throughout, giving him the much-needed elbow room to thoroughly give a paying audience a deeper role as the prodigal son than has been seen recently. While not completely gone, the typically vibrant five-part song and dance numbers strongly associated with Indian Cinema are keenly presented in a much more subtle way here. As unobtrusive expressions of emotion, as Mohan and Gita's love for each other quietly blossoms, or masterfully worked in as entertainment within the context of this captivating story. Sure, some of the dialogue does feel slightly cliché, but because this picture also avoids the aggravating burden of self-deprecating humour synonymous with this genre, award-winning writer/director Ashutosh Gowariker's cinematic offering becomes an incredibly accessible movie for serious ticket holders. That said, Gowariker's surprisingly non-preaching screenplay truly is a remarkably thoughtful examination of modern India butting up against steadfast societal norms regarding caste and gender inequality, as well as cultural beliefs passed on from one generation to the next. Khan's character is thoroughly Americanized at the outset, wincing at the thought of spending too much time in these relatively primitive surroundings. Yet, he slowly realizes the overwhelming severity of poverty and injustice he sees first hand as opportunities to use his contemporary skills towards the betterment of these villagers. To intelligently argue for progress with the elders, without being disrespectful to a rich history that bonds them at the roots. He understands Gita's dilemma as a strong willed woman strangled by customs that no-longer apply to her goals as an individual, and she responds to that in spite of her lingering fear of his presence. Astounding. Joshi easily pulls in a marvelously natural debut performance here, with co-stars Mela Ram as playfully entrepreneurial chef and Rajesh Vivek as Charanpur's quirky Postmaster dishing out a lot of the comedy relief during most of this worthwhile three hour, subtitled Hindi offering. Amazing.

I can't imagine fans of Indian Cinema not cheering for this big screen breath of fresh air - and, if there was ever a time for uninitiated moviegoers to take a second look at what's coming out of Bollywood, 'Swades' definitely marks the hour.

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Sin City
REVIEWED 04/05, © STEPHEN BOURNE
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REVIEW:

The cruel touch of fear and death chilled by endless rain sticks to your bones in Basin City. Any warm glimpse of light is chopped apart by hard, deep shadows that engulf every crumbling skyscraper, every stinking back alley and gin joint, and every body - living or dead or stuck in grey limbo somewhere in between - that manages to last through the night. For thirty-odd years, this concrete cesspool of despair had been retiring homicide detective John Hartigan's (Bruce Willis; 'The Sixth Sense' (1999), 'Hostage' (2005)) beat. Pushing sixty with a bad heart, this bashed up law man wasn't sorry to see over three decades of mutual hate from all of that end, but there was one last case that he knew would haunt him to the grave if he didn't take his last hour on the force to see it closed for good before the stroke of midnight. Eleven year-old Nancy Callahan (Makenzie Vega) was missing, and there was a murderous pedophile named Roark Jr. (Nick Stahl) on the loose. It wasn't rocket science. John knew where to find them both - together. "An old man dies," he can remember later thinking to himself, filled with bullets as his life oozed out of him on that lonely moon lit pier eight long years ago, "A young girl lives. Fair trade..." Marv (Mickey Rourke; 'Barfly (1987), 'Man on Fire' (2004)) was the kind of ex-con cursed with the bad luck of being born in the wrong Century. In medieval times or further back, this brutal thug would have had women thrown at him and parades held in his honour for cutting a swath of carnage in his hulking wake. Here, now, he's just another psycho killer. Lucky enough to have spent the night with Goldie (Jaime King; 'Pearl Harbor' (2001), 'White Chicks' (2004)), a high priced prostitute, a goddess draped in red, who turned to Marv for protection only to end up dead beside him in their heart-shaped bed. "I won't let you down, Goldie," he mutters to Wendy (her twin, also played by King), confused and hell bent on meting out vengeful justice upon his lover's killer, while clobbering through a trigger happy gauntlet of police enforcers and hired hit men, towards the pulpit of political power and the stealthy cannibal at Cardinal Roark's beck and call... Dwight (Clive Owen; 'Beyond Borders' (2003), 'Closer' (2004)) had to stop Jack Rafferty (Benicio Del Toro) and his small gang of hoodlums from terrorizing anyone anymore, trailing them in his red Cadillac under the cover of darkness into the festering heart of Basin City's Old Town. The girls - lead by Gail (Rosario Dawson), Dwight's warrior-like girlfriend - run Old Town on merciless reputation, a guarded truce with the cops who turned a blind eye, and from the barrel of a gun strapped to their sultry thighs while turning tricks on every street corner. Rafferty was out smarted and out numbered long before he even tried cruising lithe and sexy Becky (Alexis Bledel) in that lonely, shadowy alley. Dwight sees the entire ambush play out, and the brutal aftermath that quickly threatens to destroy that safe patch of debauchery as the Mob's lumbering henchman Manute (Michael Clarke Duncan) moves in to take over. "Sometimes proving you're worth a damn means dying," Dwight realizes, as his car growls into high gear and aims for the small convoy of mercenaries who left him for dead at the bottom of the nearby tar pits. "Sometimes it means killing a whole lotta people..."

Virtually torn verbatim from at least three of legendary comic book artist/writer Frank Miller's ground breaking black and white series of dark and chunky crime stories - the first reportedly debuting in Dark Horse Presents' 1991 5th Anniversary Special, before spawning the Eisner Award-winning graphic novel Sin City (1993) and nine acclaimed sequels that included The Big Fat Kill (1995) and That Yellow Bastard (1996) - this hugely stylized, star studded movie beautifully captures Miller's decidedly Film Noir imagery and swaggering dialogue clearly inspired by pulp novel icons Samuel Dashiell Hammett's (1894-1961) The Maltese Falcon (1930) and The Thin Man (1934), Raymond Thornton Chandler's (1888-1959) The Big Sleep (1939) and The Long Goodbye (1954), and Frank Morrison 'Mickey' Spillane's I, the Jury (1947) and The Big Kill (1951). Screenwriter/cinematographer/director Robert Rodriguez ('Spy Kids' (2001), 'Once Upon a Time in Mexico' (2003)) magically transforms the big screen into a living, heavily inked live action illustration featuring these three punchy vignettes of oftentimes ultra violent redemptive vigilantism for a paying audience to become completely captivated by. Visually, 'Sin City' is an absolute masterpiece of stunning, monochromatically morbid brilliance selectively highlighted with bursts of vibrant red and yellow throughout. However, a lot of the Sam Spade and Mike Hammer-like lines do seem annoyingly staid and overtly cheesy in their adaptation from page to screen. And, because the novelty of its digitized high contrast scenes does eventually give way to these tales' steady loss of pulse pounding momentum at key moments, this picture does feel over long at a hundred and twenty-six minutes. Don't get me wrong, though. Its entire cast - which also includes Jessica Alba, Brittany Murphy, Josh Hartnett, Carla Gugino, and Michael Madsen - pull in exceptionally enjoyable performances here, with Roarke easily stealing the spotlight as this hilariously Neanderthal-like, hairy knuckled galloot sucker punching, snarling at and stampeding through Kevlar and brick walls towards fulfilling his bloody vendetta. Sure, the film does have its flaws. You do need to have a relatively strong stomach and be in the right mood to sit through a blatant homage to bygone American Crime Cinema for the most part, but I can't remember seeing such an incredibly powerful and completely captivating cinematic experiment from this genre since 'Reservoir Dogs' (1992), and then 'Natural Born Killers' (1994), figuratively blew my shoes and socks off. 'Sin City' did the same thing, even though it's not quite as freshly spellbinding as Miller's original pages were over a decade ago. Keep an eye out for the bizarre chit chat car scene with Dwight and Rafferty, apparently guest directed by Quentin Tarantino as repayment for Rodriguez scoring the soundtrack for 'Kill Bill, Volume 2' (2004). Expect to sit through some gratuitous nudity, a lot of extreme violence, a truckload of macabre humour and a few aggravatingly silly lines of dialogue, but definitely buckle up for the bullet riddled roller coaster ride of your life with this memorably eye-popping, graphic extravaganza well worth checking out on the big screen. Good stuff, with more to come...

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